If a marriage proposal were just a matter of buying a ring, dropping to one knee, and asking the girl of your dreams to marry you, making a proposal would be easy. Unfortunately for you, buddy, you live in the year 2011. That means you have to make a special proposal of marriage–something unique that will knock your girlfriend’s socks off.

Asking a woman for her hand in marriage is one of the most stressful events in a man’s life. You feel pressure to buy the perfect ring, to make the perfect reservation, to look your best, and of course you have to worry about the woman’s answer.

AskDeb has your back. Here’s a quick guide to how to propose.

1. Be Creative

If you think that the perfect proposal or the perfect engagement has to cost you a ton of  money, you’re way off the mark. Unless you’re dating a princess or the daughter of a

captain of industry, you don’t have to spend a ton of cash. The best proposals and engagements don’t cost a ton of money . . . they’re creative.

First and foremost, keep your planned proposal to yourself. The more people you let in on the big secret, the more likely someone is to spill the beans. Surprise proposals are the best, especially if you have something creative in mind.

Creative proposals involve more than eating at a nice restaurant and dropping to one knee at the table. If you and your future fiancee are sports fans, consider asking for her hand at a baseball game. Get the crowd involved, or (better yet) talk to the park employees ahead of time and get your proposal on the Jumbotron.

2. Buy the Right Ring

Again, we’re not talking about the expense of the ring here. Just take care that the ring you buy meets two criteria:

• She will love it (meaning it fits her style).
• You love it.

If you are having trouble finding the perfect engagement ring, there’s no shame in purchasing a “placeholder” just so you can pop the question. Trust us–she won’t really be worried about the ring itself if you blow her away with the presentation.

3. Make it Personal

The way you pop the question should reflect your attitudes and identity as a couple. Your girlfriend sees your relationship as something unique, and you should too. Show her that you do by making your engagement unique and indicative of the two of you as a couple.

For example: my brother and his wife are both writers. When he was ready to ask her to marry him, he purchased classified ads at the newspaper she worked at that led her on a “wild goose chase” around the office. When she finally found him, he presented her with roses and gave her a dozen reasons why he wanted to marry her. If you heart didn’t melt just from reading that, I don’t know what to tell you . . .

Asking a woman to marry you is the most important thing you’ll do for quite some time, a keystone in the life of a young man. If you follow the simple advice above, it will be a proposal that you and your future wife will cherish forever.

There are many places in the world where homosexuals are allowed to get married or to form civil unions. Gay marriage is a hot-button issue in America, but in a few places around the world, gay marriage and union has been legal for years.

Gay Marriage vs. Civil Unions

Not every gay marriage law allows traditional marriage between homosexuals. Many cities in America and countries around the world have allowed for something called “civil unions” as a concession to the gay community without angering that portion of the population that believes marriage should only take place between a man and a woman.

The concept of a “civil union” is a recent one. The concept was born in Denmark in 1989 and has spread around the worldsince then. A civil union gives a same-sex couples the same rights, benefits, and responsibilities as a married couple. Civil unions between homosexuals are favored in areas where making a change to marriage law would be time-consuming and costly, or in areas with a heavily religious population.

Every civil union law is a little different–civil unions in the state of Vermont, for example, are intended to completely imitate marriage, providing same-sex couples with a viable path to marriage without addressing the issue of whether or not marriage is defined as between a man and a woman. Other civil unions are more restrictive, creating civil unions that are distinct from marriage and may not allow all the same rights to same sex couples that traditional married couples would have.

Gay Marriage in America

Here is a breakdown of every state in America and their policy toward gay marriage and civil unions.

Alabama–Marriage is defined as a union between a man and a woman. No civil unions, no gay marriage.

Alaska–Marriage is defined as a union between a man and a woman. No civil unions, no gay marriage.

Arizona–Marriage is defined as a union between a man and a woman. No civil unions, no gay marriage.

Arkansas–Marriage is defined as a union between a man and a woman. No civil unions, no gay marriage.

California–The law in California banning gay marriage is still being worked out in the courts. For now, civil unions are available under certain conditions, and are essentially the same as heterosexual marriages in terms of rights and responsibilities.

Colorado–Marriage is defined as a union between a man and a woman. There are provisions that allow for civil unions.

Connecticut–Gay marriages and civil unions are legal in Connecticut.

Delaware–Marriage is defined as a union between a man and a woman. No civil unions, no gay marriage.

District of Columbia–Both domestic partnerships and gay marriage are legal.

Florida–Marriage is defined as a union between a man and a woman. No civil unions, no gay marriage.

Georgia–Marriage is defined as a union between a man and a woman. No civil unions, no gay marriage.

Hawaii–A legal gray area exists in Hawaiian civil union laws. A civil union law is being voted on as of this writing.

Idaho–Marriage is defined as a union between a man and a woman. No civil unions, no gay marriage.

Illinois–Marriage is defined as a union between a man and a woman. No civil unions, no gay marriage.

Indiana–Marriage is defined as a union between a man and a woman. No civil unions, no gay marriage.

Iowa–Marriage is defined as a union between a man and a woman. No civil unions, no gay marriage.

Kansas–Marriage is defined as a union between a man and a woman. No civil unions, no gay marriage.

Kentucky–Marriage is defined as a union between a man and a woman. No civil unions, no gay marriage.

Louisiana–Marriage is defined as a union between a man and a woman. No civil unions, no gay marriage.

Maine–Same-sex couples married in states where their union is legal can apply for domestic partnerships in Maine.

Maryland–One of the oldest “definition of marriage as between a man and a woman” laws, Maryland has banned gay marriage since 1973. Marriage is defined as a union between a man and a woman. No civil unions, no gay marriage.

Massachusetts–Gay marriages and civil unions are legal in Massachusetts.

Michigan–Marriage is defined as a union between a man and a woman. No civil unions, no gay marriage.

Minnesota–Marriage is defined as a union between a man and a woman. No civil unions, no gay marriage.

Mississippi–Marriage is defined as a union between a man and a woman. No civil unions, no gay marriage.

Missouri–Marriage is defined as a union between a man and a woman. No civil unions, no gay marriage.

Montana–Marriage is defined as a union between a man and a woman. No civil unions, no gay marriage.

Nebraska–Marriage is defined as a union between a man and a woman. No civil unions, no gay marriage.

Nevada–Marriage is defined as a union between a man and a woman. No civil unions, no gay marriage.

New Hampshire–Gay marriage is legal in New Hampshire. In fact, there’s no such thing as a “civil union” as of January 1, 2011. That’s the day that all “civil unions” became legal marriages.

New Jersey–The only legal marriage status for same-sex couples in New Jersey is a limited civil union.

New Mexico–Marriage is defined as a union between a man and a woman. No civil unions, no gay marriage.

New York–Marriage is defined as a union between a man and a woman. No civil unions, no gay marriage.

North Carolina–Marriage is defined as a union between a man and a woman. No civil unions, no gay marriage.

North Dakota–Marriage is defined as a union between a man and a woman. No civil unions, no gay marriage.

Ohio–Marriage is defined as a union between a man and a woman. No civil unions, no gay marriage.

Oklahoma–Marriage is defined as a union between a man and a woman. No civil unions, no gay marriage.

Oregon–Civil unions only.

Pennsylvania–Marriage is defined as a union between a man and a woman. No civil unions, no gay marriage.

Rhode Island–Marriage is defined as a union between a man and a woman. No civil unions, no gay marriage.

South Carolina–Marriage is defined as a union between a man and a woman. No civil unions, no gay marriage.

South Dakota–Marriage is defined as a union between a man and a woman. No civil unions, no gay marriage.

Tennessee–Marriage is defined as a union between a man and a woman. No civil unions, no gay marriage.

Texas–Marriage is defined as a union between a man and a woman. No civil unions, no gay marriage.

Utah–Marriage is defined as a union between a man and a woman. No civil unions, no gay marriage.

Vermont–Full marriage rights available to same-sex couples. No civil unions allowed.

Virginia–Marriage is defined as a union between a man and a woman. No civil unions, no gay marriage.

Washington–Marriage is defined as a union between a man and a woman. No civil unions, no gay marriage.

West Virginia–Marriage is defined as a union between a man and a woman. No civil unions, no gay marriage.

Wisconsin–Limited domestic partnerships exist, but there is no legal gay marriage.

Wyoming–Marriage is defined as a union between a man and a woman. No civil unions, no gay marriage.

Sure, your relationship started out fantastic — think back to that first date, the electricity of meeting someone new, the fire in your eyes. Everything seemed easy and natural, you should be completely ecstatic about this relationship, right?

If things between you and your lover have started to cool off or you just don’t “feel” as happy as you used to, it may be time to give your partner notice that you’re moving on. If it isn’t quite time to make that drastic of a change, maybe a series of smaller changes would help steer you and your lover back to Paradise.

If you’re not sure, check for the following six signs to determine if your relationship is completely over.

1. Feeling distant?

It is a terrible feeling — do you sometimes feel like you and your partner are so far apart that you can’t possibly communicate across the divide?

If you feel like there’s a chasm between the two of you, something is definitely wrong. Just like we take a look at how our body is feeling to determine if we’re sick, these kinds of feelings in a relationship mean that something is missing.

Maybe there was a time when the two of you could talk without opening your mouths, but now one of you just isn’t communicating, visually or otherwise. Maybe you don’t feel like communicating to your partner at all, or that it is a “sure thing” that the two of you will be doing the same old thing tonight.

You can give yourself a mental workout trying to figure out where the distance comes from, but sometimes people create this distance when they “check out” of a relationship. Makes it easier for them to say goodbye when the inevitable happens.

2. Where Are the Warm & Fuzzy Feelings?

Think about your lover. Did something change in your body? Did you smile? Did you wiggle in your chair?

If you didn’t, your relationship is in dutch. There was a time when every thought of your lover made you melt into the floor. If the only thoughts you have about this person now are thoughts of frustration or sadness, this one may already be out the door.

3. No More Sex

If you can’t remember the last time you and your partner had a romp in the sack together, or if you aren’t even interested in remembering, this is the surest sign of all that your relationship is over. Look, every relationship goes through dry spells or slow periods of lovemaking, but it is that complete lack of desire or eagerness to make love that points out how poorly your partnership is going.

4. Fighting All the Time

I’ll be the first person to admit that couples fight from time to time. A few fights here and there is healthy.

If you and your lover have kept the neighbors up for days from your bickering, or if you’ve been ignoring each other or making jabs at each other for days on end, you two have simply been fighting way too much. If couples didn’t fight, they’d never really learn about one another. It is when you spend more time fighting than not fighting that a problem arises. This is a dangerous sign, as it simply means that you don’t like each other all that much. Put simply, if neither one of you wants to work on your fighting, the only other way to end the yelling and name-calling is to end the relationship itself.

5. Hate, Hate, Hate

Is hate all around you? Do you two find yourselves picking on one another’s taste in music, food, friends, pretty much everything?

If a person is annoying you in every way — the way they pour a glass of water, the way they sound in the shower, etc — you’ve got some serious work to do if you want to stay in a relationship with them. The other thing to consider — maybe that person really is this annoying, or maybe you are. Either way, staying in a relationship with someone you hate, or who hates you, is less healthy than getting out of it. So get out of there.

6. Scared About the Future

There was a time when the two of you loved nothing more than planning time together. Picnics on the weekend, summer vacations, even shopping trips were fun events worth spending time together.

Now, your partner asks about a trip to Mexico this summer and you completely ignore it. Or maybe you hint that you should go see your lover’s family this Spring Break, and nothing more is ever said. Bad sign.

If this is happening, don’t jump to the conclusion that your relationship is doomed. Talking can help. But if you or your partner are unwilling to make firm plans with each other, it means that one or both of you are worried that you won’t be together when it is time for that plan to be executed. If the two of you can’t imagine a fun future vacation together, how can you be planning a relationship that could end in having kids together or even marriage?

None of these six signs are sure signs that your relationship can not be saved. Having said that, if you’re have been noticing that most of these signs sound like you, it may be time to take complete stock of what the two of you are really sharing.

It is up to the two people in the relationship to decide if the pairing is worthwhile or not, so (even though it is a cliche) now is the time to really “listen to your heart”. While I wouldn’t advise you ignore the signs completely, I suggest you talk to your partner before deciding you are Splitsville.

See also:

1. How to Be a Good Husband
2. What Men Want in a Woman
3. Breaking Up Advice
   

“Getting married is a lot like getting into a tub of hot water. After you get used to it, it ain’t so hot.”

Minnie Pearl

Knowing how to be a good husband means knowing what your wife wants. If you want to make your wife happy–either to increase the romance in your relationship or to cool her off after you made a mistake–you need to learn to be a good husband.

So what is a “good husband” anyway? Different people will have different opinions about just what makes a husband good. Generally, you know you’re a good husband if you have a happy wife.

What a Happy Wife Looks Like

A happy wife has the freedom to engage in her own hobbies though she shares some interests with her husband.

Speaking of her husband–he is a man with a job that allows them to maintain their lifestyle without taking him away from the home too often. The wife may work, or not, depending on her preference.

A happy wife has a husband who loves her–she is sure that he loves her because he does things to show her his love. A good husband does the little things and the big things needed to maintain his wife’s happiness. A happy husband and wife have a lighthearted and romantic time together.

A happy wife is not the house-cleaner and child-raiser–she shares those chores with her husband. This is not just a verbal contract, but a part of their marriage together, sharing the work of running a home equally between them.

A good husband doesn’t make his wife’s life perfect–but he makes her feel content with her life and her marriage, and the two are optimistic about their future together.

What Does Your Wife Want?

There are five things that most women want out of their husbands. If you can provide these five things, you’ll have a happy wife.

Emotional honesty. This means being “open” about your emotions with your wife. The way you encourage this is to talk all the time. Talk about your job, talk about her job, talk about your friends, your feelings, anything at all she wants to talk about. This emotional honesty makes the two of you a better team, and it makes it easier to share an entire lifetime with your wife.

A strong emotional connection. You can talk all you want and still not have an emotional connection. A good husband and wife team should be more than business partners or good friends–they should make love and share their love as often as possible. Be your wife’s lover, friend, and sounding board as often as she needs.

A good provider. Regardless of how the gender roles work in your house, being part of a marriage means providing at least 50% of the family’s income or doing 50% of the family work. You don’t need to make a million dollars a year, but you should be in a work situation that you’re proud of and be able to supply your family’s needs.

A partner that wants to be happy. Being depressed or mentally unhealthy is a big problem for those who love you, especially your wife who lives with you every day. Improve your mental health–become a happier person, do things you like together, and make sacrifices here and there to keep yourselves mentally healthy and happy.

A partner that shows interest. If you learn the ins and outs of your wife’s needs, emotionally, financially, or otherwise, she will grow closer to you, and learn to trust and love you all the more for it.

How to Be a Good Husband – Tips and Advice

Here’s ten things you can do on a daily basis to make your wife happy and be a good husband.

1. Cook a meal just for you and your wife, no kids allowed. We don’t often get to sit and eat an adult meal (with dessert and wine) without talking about the kids’ school or some other nonsense. Cook your wife’s favorite fancy meal, and surprise her after a long day at work. Don’t forget a babysitter.

2. Be friends with your wife’s family and friends. This shows her that her world is as important to you as it is to her. Be friendly to your wife’s family every day, and your future with her (and her friends and family) will be easier for it.

3. Every day, do one chore around the house. Even if today isn’t “cleaning day”, go ahead and sweep or mop or vacuum something. If you and your wife both do one small thing every day around the house, the work load will shrink remarkably, and you’ll show each other that you’re willing to work together.

4. Pick up your wife’s favorite snack or dessert on the way home from work. Not only does it prove you’re thinking about her while you’re at work, but she gets a sweet treat to share with you.

5. Give your wife a back massage or rub her feet. Physical contact strengthens your love, and she’ll probably do you a favor in return.

6. Pay your wife a new compliment each morning. Don’t just say the thing that pops up first in your head–spend some time thinking about her and what you love about her.

7. Do something fun every day. It can be a simple word game or funny dance to make her laugh, a trip to the driving range or mini golf, or making dinner together with your kids. A house filled with laughter is a house with a happy wife.

8. Kiss your wife first thing every morning.

9. Get into a sports team with your wife. She may think she doesn’t like sports, but I bet there’s a team she can get behind. If you and your wife are both Lakers fans, I can guarantee a few months out of the year of happy husband and wife time watching basketball.

10. Prepare a cup of coffee every morning for your wife before she wakes up. This is a small step that goes a long way toward making a happy wife.

Your actions make you a good husband. It is as simple as this. Do nice things for her all the time, give her what she wants in a husband, and think of her needs before you think of your own. If you can follow that advice, you’ll be the world’s best husband.

See also:

1. How to Be a Good Husband
2. What Men Want in a Woman
3. How to Be an Affectionate Husband
   

The best places to elope are places with lax marriage laws and beautiful scenery.

Eloping is a lost art. There was a time in our history when sneaking away with your lover to get married was downright honorable.

People elope to sneak out of a bad situation or to get married without parental approval. These days, some people elope just for the heck of it — they see it as a unique alternative to a traditional wedding.

Certain parts of the country are better destinations to head for if you’re planning on eloping; the marriage license laws in some places are more conducive to eloping. Combine lax marriage laws with beautiful surroundings and you’ve got the perfect eloping destination.

Here are my votes for the best places to elope:

Napa Valley, California

Elope and spend your honeymoon in California’s wine country. The state of California has no residency requirements and no waiting period for marriage. Escape into the night and drive to Napa Valley, and you can be married before the next morning. Spend your honeymoon touring wineries, eating some of the country’s best food, and enjoying the scenic drives through Napa Valley.

Maui, Hawaii

Where Are the Best Places to Elope?

If you can make it across the water to Hawaii, you’ll be in an eloper’s paradise. This island state has no residency requirements to get a marriage license. You don’t even have to be a US citizen to get married in Hawaii. There’s also no waiting period before your marriage license is issued. If you’re an American citizen and your spouse-to-be is not, jetting off to Hawaii for a quick elopement is practical and pleasurable. Get out to Paradise and get hitched.

Miami, Florida

Forget what you learned on sitcoms about retirement communities. Miami is an active city with vibrant night life and plenty of young people looking to have fun. The state of Florida requires nothing in the way of residency, and there’s no waiting period in Florida if you live in another state. Elopers in Georgia would be smart to scoot down to Florida and get a no-waiting-period marriage license.

New Orleans

Long known as an eloper’s haven, New Orleans earns that title by requiring no proof of residency and by issuing marriage licenses with no waiting period. The state of Louisiana is notoriously lax when it comes to marriage law, and you and your new bride can take advantage of that in a beautiful setting. From the French Quarter to the mighty Mississippi, New Orleans is one elopement destination you won’t soon forget.

Austin, Texas

Texas has a 48 hour waiting period for a marriage license, but no residency requirement. You can spend that your 48 hour waiting period in the state capital — everything from fine dining and haute couture to Texas-style barbecue and country line dancing takes place in the Texas hill country.

Alaska

Looking for a memorable location for your elopement? The state of Alaska has no residency requirement, but in many places you will have to wait out a 72 hour waiting period before you get your hands on your marriage license. The state of Alaska is the most exotic state in the United States of America, featuring a landscape and plenty of flora and fauna found nowhere else in the US. If you and your new spouse can’t keep each other occupied for 72 hours among this kind of beauty, then you’re doing it wrong.

You can more ideas from this cool book available at Amazon: Let’s Elope: The Definitive Guide to Eloping, Destination Weddings, and Other Creative Wedding Options. (Buy it via our link here, and we’ll make a little bit of money for recommending it.)

This article is part of a “where are the best places to…” series of articles, more of which can be found below:

• Where Are the Best Places to Propose?
• Where Are the Best Places to SCUBA Dive?
• Where Are the Best Places to Study Abroad?
• Where Are the Best Places to Honeymoon?
• Where Are the Best Places to Retire?
• Where Are the Best Places to Travel?
• What Is the Best Places to Incorporate?
• Where Are the Best Places to Elope?

If you have  a little cash saved away you can make your proposal really memorable.

Here are the ten best places to propose, according to me:

1. The Taj Mahal

The Taj Mahal is a monument to love that outlasts life. If you propose in the early morning or late evening hours, you’ll avoid the overcrowded Taj Mahal atmosphere and the white marble of the monument will glow with the sun’s rays.

2. Niagara Falls

Niagara Falls has been synonymous with romance for decades. Niagara Falls offers massive waterfalls and romantic walks. It’s a popular honeymoon hotspot, but doubles easily as a proposal site. The negative ions produced by the roaring water is reputed to be a powerful aphrodisiac. So if you aren’t sure if your partner will say “Yes” — simply take them where the rushing water will get them in the mood.

3. The Eiffel Tower

Is anything more romantic than Paris? Is any spot in Paris more romantic than this soaring tower? Countless lovers, including famous people like Tom Cruise, have used the Eiffel Tower as a proposal site. Time your proposal to match one of the gigantic and impressive light shows that happen every night.

4. Venice

The World's Greatest Proposals

This Italian city is the Paris of the Mediterranean. If you’re proposing in Venice, you should arrange a gondola ride through the narrow canals of Venice, or you could make it a grander adventure by coasting through the Grand Canal. Either way, book one of the city’s serenading gondoliers and enjoy musical accompaniment for your proposal.

5. Isla Mujeres, Mexico

Not many people know about this spectacular spot. If you hike over to the eastern edge of this tiny island you can pop the question at a spot called the Cliff of the Dawn. This is the first bit of Mexican soil to see the sun rise. Look around for another delight, a small Mayan temple built for none other than the Goddess of Fertility. Que romantico.

6. The Grand Canyon

The Grand Canyon is better known as a family vacation spot, but that shouldn’t stop you from enjoying it as a proposal spot. The Grand Canyon offers plenty of spots to choose from for your proposal. Consider a hike to the bottom of the canyon for camping, or consider taking a hot air balloon ride or helicopter ride for the proposal.

7. The Las Vegas Strip

If you and your partner are the active social type, a Las Vegas proposal could be perfect for you. Las Vegas has no end of potential proposal sites, from a gondola ride at the Venetian to helicopter rides over the strip — your imagination is the only limit.

8. A nationally-televised sporting event

How much more romantic can you be? If you and your partner are big sports fans, you can work it out ahead of time to put your proposal on the Jumbotron (for a hefty fee most likely) and have your proposal shared with thousands and thousands of fans. And don’t forget the millions of people watching at home.

9. The site of your first date

No matter how difficult it is to find the location of your first date or how expensive it may be to fly the two of you there, popping the question where the two of you first awkwardly held hands is the most romantic proposal idea you can imagine. If you can somehow get your future spouse to that spot without them knowing, so much the better.

10. Anywhere

Most people can’t jet off to the Taj Mahal or Chichen Itza at a moment’s notice. That’s why the best place to propose to your future spouse is anywhere at all. Get down on one knee in line at McDonald’s or after a church service one Sunday. The point of getting engaged isn’t to do it in a fancy way, just to do it. The fact that the two of you just got engaged will help convince your partner that you’re a true romantic.

For more ideas, take a look at The World’s Greatest Proposals. (If you buy a copy of it via Amazon, then we make a tiny commission, too.)

This is the first in a series of “where are the best places?” articles:

• Where Are the Best Places to Propose?
• Where Are the Best Places to SCUBA Dive?
• Where Are the Best Places to Study Abroad?
• Where Are the Best Places to Honeymoon?
• Where Are the Best Places to Retire?
• Where Are the Best Places to Travel?
• What Is the Best Places to Incorporate?
• Where Are the Best Places to Elope?

Modern Bride magazine published the results of a poll about the best honeymoon vacation spots.

Here are the 10 best places to honeymoon and a few notes about each destination.

Hawaii

It’s a cliche to say you’re going to Hawaii for your honeymoon. But stereotypes exist for a reason. This is the number one Honeymoon destination because the word Hawaii is synonymous with luxury, beauty, and relaxation. Whether you want long walks on the beach, thrilling watersports and activities, or great food and drink, Hawaii’s the perfect spot for a honeymoon.

Italy

Romantic but affordable, and European without the snobbery, Italy is a great place for a honeymoon much like Hawaii is. You can have such a wide range of experiences. Italy is full of great destinations for travel, from historic Rome and Vatican City to the Italian Alps and nearby Switzerland.

Tahiti

The Modern Bride Survival Guide

Spas, cruises, crystal clear water, and perfect temperatures year round? Who wouldn’t want to spend their honeymoon in such a place. Tahiti is all about activities, from diving and fishing to golf and even taking in a show at the Hippodrome. If you’re looking for an active and sun-filled Honeymoon, check out Tahiti.

Anguilla

Named for its long eel-like shape, Anguilla is a new hot spot for honeymoons. Located in the Caribbean southeast of the Virgin Islands, Anguilla is known for its unspoiled natural beauty and wide variety of outdoor and romantic opportunities. Fantastic duty-free shopping accompanies the standard island watersports to create a dream honeymoon spot.

Fiji

Fiji is a country made up of 322 smaller islands. Honeymooning in Fiji means staying in one of the most romantic locations in all of the South Pacific. Few tourists visit Fiji compared to the tourist levels on other tropical islands, so that means your honeymoon will be unique. Also, you won’t be bumping into Americans around every corner.

St Lucia

Located northwest of Barbados, St. Lucia is an island that has equal cultural influence from the British, the French, and native peoples. This means the island is a kind of melting pot of food, fashion, and languages. You can enjoy swimming in the beautiful waters of the eastern Caribbean during the day and have romantic meals for two at night. St. Lucia is one of the great under-hyped Caribbean islands.

Mexico

Honeymoons in Mexico are fun because of the incredible value of the American Dollar versus the Mexican Peso. You can still have amazing meals, fancy drinks, and all the tourist trappings that come with a warm climate and lots of beaches . . . but you do it spending a lot less money in the process.

St Bart’s

This is the shortened name of Saint Barthélemy, an island with a distinct French influence from food to culture. St. Bart’s is unique because it also has a Swedish influence, having been a protectorate of Sweden for some time. St. Bart’s is a playground for the wealthy, featuring lots of fancy restaurants and high-end shopping.

Jamaica

It isn’t all reggae and tropical drinks in Jamaica (though reggae and tropical drinks do usually make for an amazing Honeymoon) — this large island country is a commonwealth of England and has all the charm of a colonial Caribbean island. 1.3 million tourists visit Jamaica each year, so you know the island knows how to cater to visitors.

France

When you think of love, passion, and romance, you think of France. French is the language of love, after all. Your French Honeymoon can be so many things, from wine tours and museum visits to walks in the countryside and lots of great home cooking. If you are looking for a romantic European Honeymoon, it is hard to do better than France.

For more ideas, take a look at The Modern Bride Survival Guide. We make a small commission from Amazon if you buy via our link, which we’ll use to keep this site operating.

This is part of a series of blog posts we’ve made about “the best places to.” Some of the other posts in this series include:

• Where Are the Best Places to Propose?
• Where Are the Best Places to SCUBA Dive?
• Where Are the Best Places to Study Abroad?
• Where Are the Best Places to Honeymoon?
• Where Are the Best Places to Retire?
• Where Are the Best Places to Travel?
• What Is the Best Places to Incorporate?
• Where Are the Best Places to Elope?

How old do you have to be to get married?

When I was growing up in the 80s, there was a defined legal minimum age required before a couple could be legally married. I remember this because my uncle was in a long relationship with a woman and I remember him talking about wanting to be married and that since they were both over the age of 16. That seemed very old to me then — I was around 8– but come to find out that old law has changed dramatically.

Depending on where you live, the legal age of consent (the age at which a person can legally consent to sexual activity) and the minimum age required for marriage are different. In almost every state, the legal age of consent is actually lower than the legal age required to be married. For example, in New Mexico the legal age of consent is 16 but the minimum age for marriage is 18. Another extreme example of a great difference between age of consent and marriage age is Mississippi, where the age of consent is 16 but both members of a couple must be 21 years old to marry.

Pregnancy and Marriage

In every state in America, a pregnancy can be grounds for marriage as long as the couple gets court approval–this is handy because court approval requires a medical test to prove a woman is pregnant. This little clause seems antiquated–I know plenty of unwed couples doing a good job of raising a baby together, but for some reason we here in America want to see all people who have babies together become married.

State-by-State Marriage Laws

Alabama

The age is 18 unless the following applies — if either person is under 18, they will need a certified copy of both party’s birth certificates. Both parents must be present and carrying identification. If one or both parents are deceased, proper evidence of such must be provided. Individuals under the age of 14 may not marry under any circumstance.

Alaska

The age is 18 unless the following applies — if either person is under 18, they will need a certified copy of both party’s birth certificates. Both parents must be present and carrying identification.

Arizona

The age is 18, however you can marry at age 16 is you have the notarized consent of your parents or legal guardian. If you are under 16, you must have the notarized consent of your parents or legal guardian as well as a court order.

Arkansas

The age is 18, however those under 18 can be married if both sets of paretns consent.

California

The age is 18, but if either the bride or groom is under 18, at least one of the minor’s parents must appear with the couple. Certified copies of birth certificates are required. The couple must also schedule an appointment with a counselor and then appear before a superior court judge for approval

Colorado

You can be married at 16, but you will need the written consent of both parents or simply seek judicial approval, usually granted for pregnancy.

Connecticut

The legal age is 16 with written parental consent, but if either member of the couple is under the age of sixteen, they can still be married if they have the written consent of the judge for the district where the minor resides. Written parental consent is needed if under 18 years of age.

Delaware

The age of marriage is 18, but signed parental consent forms will allow you to marry between the age of 16 and 18.

Florida

The age of marriage with no restriction is 18, however If a person is between the age of 16 and 18, a marriage license can be obtained with parental consent. Interestingly enough, all you have to do to get a marriage license when pregnant (at any age) is to swear that they are pregnant before a judge and produce a written statement from a doctor.

Georgia

If you are between the ages of 16 and 18, you can apply for a marriage license if you go to the court with both parents who have provided written consent. If the bride is pregnant, no parental consent is required if you submit a statement from a licensed physician certifying the pregnancy.

Hawaii

The age is 18 unless the following applies — if either person is under 18, they will need a certified copy of both party’s birth certificates. Both parents must be present and carrying identification.

Idaho

The age is 18 unless the following applies — if either person is under 18, they will need a certified copy of both party’s birth certificates. Both parents must be present and carrying identification. You must be accompanied by one of your parents or your legal guardian and have written parental consent on the Affidavit of Consent to Marriage of Minor. If you are under 16 years of age, you will also need a court order.

Illinois

If you are 16 or 17 years of age, you will have to provide a copy of your birth certificate along with some other sort of identification showing your date of birth. You will also need to have the sworn consent from each parent, each legal guardian or a judge – in person – before the county clerk at the time of application. If your parent is deceased, you will need to show a death certificate or proof of guardianship, or a court order waiving consent. A legal guardian will also need to show a certified copy of the guardianship papers. If you are under 16 years of age, you cannot get married.

Indiana

A certified copy of your birth certificate is required. If you are 17 years old you must apply for the license with both parents (or the person with legal custody). They will need to sign the consent portion of the application. If you are 16 or 15 years old, you must petition the Circuit Court via a “Permission to Marry” form.

Iowa

Under 18 applicants (16 or 17 years of age) need to have parental consent.

Kansas

The age of marriage is 18, but any applicant for a marriage license who is under the age of 18 must have either notarized written consent of all living parents or notarized written consent of one parent or legal guardian and consent of a district court judge.

Kentucky

The age is 18 or above. If a person is between the ages of 16 and 18, he or she must have the consent of parents or legal guardians.

Louisiana

The age of marriage is 18, but if either member of the marraige is between the ages of 16 and 18, the presence and signatures of both parents are required. If either party is under the age of 16, a court order is required in order to obtain a license.

Maine

Applicants must be over 18 years old. Maine has rather strict laws — there is no case in which a marriage license can be handed out under the age of 16.

Maryland

Parental consent is needed if under 18 years of age. If you are between 16-18 years of age, one of your parents or guardian must be with you and provide written consent. If you are under 16 years of age, you will need both the written consent of your custodial parent or guardian and the written approval of a judge of the Orphans’ Court Division of the Court of Common Pleas. If you are under 18, pregnant or have a child, and show a certificate from a licensed physician stating you are pregnant or have had a child, the parental consent requirement may be waived.

Massachusetts

Age 18 years or older. A birth certificate may be required to show proof of age.  If either party is under 18, a court order from a probate or district court where the minor resides must be obtained before the marriage intentions can be filed.

Michigan

Applicants 16 years of age may marry with parental or legal guardian written consent. Applicants under the age of 15 with parental consent and probate court permission. ‘Marriage of a Minor’: The legal marriage of a minor “shall release such minor from parental control.”

Minnesota

Applicants between the ages of 15 and 18 must have the consent of a parent, guardian or the judge of juvenile court. Applicants younger than 15 need the written consent of a parent of guardian and the consent of a juvenile court judge.

Mississippi

Mississippi has the highest legal marriage age in the country — parental consent is needed if either member of the pair is under the age of 21. If parents or guardians do not give consent at time of application, they will be notified via certified mail for their later consent. The marriage application will be held for only three days to allow the parents to decide. Marriage licenses cannot be issued under any circumstance to males under the age of 17, or to females under the age of 15. If the clerk receives a signed authorization from either parent, the minimum age requirement can be completely waived.

Missouri

A person under age 18 cannot marry without the consent of the custodial parent or guardian. DzA person under age 15 cannot marry without approval of a judge in the county where the marriage license is sought. The statute states that the judge should grant approval only upon a showing of “good cause” and that unusual conditions make the marriage “advisable.” Persons lacking mental capacity to consent to marriage cannot marry without court approval.

Montana

If you are 16 or 17 years old, you must have the consent of both parents unless only one parent has legal custody of you. Both of you, as a couple, will also have to attend at least two counseling sessions that are at least 10 days apart. This has to be done with a designated counselor who will then have to provide a letter that states the names of the couple, their ages, the dates of the counseling sessions, and what the counselor thinks about their possible marriage.

Nebraska

Under 19 — A notarized consent form must be signed by the person’s legal guardian giving consent to the marriage of the minor. Nebraska will not issue a marriage license if either applicant is under 17 years of age.

Nevada

If you are 16 or 17 years old, you must have one parent or legal guardian present. A notarized written permission is also acceptable. It must be written in English and needs to state the name, birth date, age of the minor child, along with the relationship of the person giving consent. The notary must note that the parent or guardian personally appeared before or was subscribed and sworn to. If you are under 16, marriage can be authorized only by court order when the request has been filed by either parent or legal guardian.

New Hampshire

A female between the age of 13 and 17 years and a male between the age of 14 and 17 years can be married only with the permission of their parent (guardian) and a waiver. A female below the age of 13 and a male below the age of 14 are not allowed to marry under any conditions. If both parties are nonresidents of NH and are below the age of 18 they cannot be married in NH under any conditions.

New Jersey

Applicants under 18 can marry if both parents consent to the marriage. The consent must be given under oath in front of two witnesses. Males: 16 or younger parties may marry with parental consent and/or permission of judge. Younger parties may obtain license in case of pregnancy or birth of child. Females: 16 or younger parties may marry with parental consent and/or permission of judge. Younger parties may obtain license in case of pregnancy or birth of child.

New Mexico

Parental consent is required if either party is between 16 and 18 years of age. If either member of the couple is 15 years of age, a court order is required. New Mexico has an odd system whereby there’s no waiting period for marriage, and licenses are issued and declared valid immediately and never expire.

New York

If you are 16 or 17 years of age, you will need to have a completed parental consent form filled out by both parents. If you are either 14 or 15 years of age, you will need to show the written consent of both parents and a justice of the Supreme Court or a judge of the local Family Court. Applicants under 14 years of age cannot marry. Only one parent’s consent will be accepted if one parent is deceased or has been missing for over a year, or if one parent has full custody from a divorce proceeding. Your parents or guardians must give their consent in person before the town or city clerk or some other authorized official. If they are out of state, a notarized affidavit is acceptable but has to be accompanied by a certificate of authentication when the consent is filed in New York State.

North Carolina

Applicants 18 to 20 must present a certified copy of their birth certificate. Applicants 16 and 17 must present a consent form signed by the parent, individual, agency or institution having legal custody or serving as the legal guardian of the underage party. (birth certificate is also required). The consent form must be notarized. Applicants 14 and 15 must provide a certified copy of the court order authorizing the marriage. A certified copy of the birth certificate is also required. A marriage license may not be issued to applicants under 14 years of age.

North Dakota

If a person is between sixteen and eighteen years of age, a marriage license may not be issued without the consent of the parents or guardian. This requires a notarized statement.

Ohio

If you are 18 to 21 years of age, you will need to show your birth certificate. Persons aged 16-17 must have consent to marry from parents or legal guardians and may have to contact the Probate Court. Additionally, the Judge may require the minors to state that they have received marriage counseling that is satisfactory to the court. Section 3101.05 also mentions how the court will deal with a pregnant minor.

Oklahoma

If you are under 18, your parents must appear at the courthouse with you to sign a consent form. Minors must wait three days before the marriage license is valid.

Oregon

Under 18: Anyone not yet 17 years of age cannot be legally married in the State of Oregon. A seventeen year old can be married if they have the parent’s or guardian’s consent (State Consent form needed).

Pennsylvania

If under 18 years of age applicants may marry with consent of a parent or guardian. Applicants must present Birth Certificate plus an additional $5.00. Okay, if under 16 years of age with the approval of a Judge of the Orphans Court, as well as parent or guardian.

Rhode Island

Under 18: A Minor’s Permit to marry must be completed if a female applicant is 16 or 17 years of age. The permit must be signed and notarized in the presence of the City or Town Clerk or any clerk employed in that office. ²A female under age 16 and a male under age 18 cannot secure a marriage license in the State of Rhode Island without the approval of the Family Court.

South Carolina

If you are under 18, you will need a certified copy of your birth certificate and a notarized statement of parental consent. The minimum age for a female is 14 and it is 16 for a male.

South Dakota

Applicants 16 and 17 must have parental consent. South Dakota law does not permit marriage of those under 16.

Texas

The age is 18 without from a parent or your legal guardian. If under the age of 16, the law requires that the couple receives a court order before being allowed to marry.

Tennessee

If either party is under the age of 18, they must be accompanied by parents. If under the age of 16, Tennessee law requires that the couple receives a court order before being allowed to marry.

Utah

The law states that marriage at the age of 18 years and above does not require parental consent. For those aged 16-17, parental consent is necessary. For those 15 years old, the following requirements must be met: Parental consent must be obtained. Approval from Juvenile Court is necessary. The court must conclude that the marriage is voluntary and in the best interests of the minor.

Vermont

If you are at least 16, but under 18, you will need the consent of a parent or guardian.

Virginia

If either of you are under 18 years of age, you must have written, notarized consent from a parent or your legal guardian.

Washington

If under the age of 18, proof of age is required (birth certificate or driver’s license). Additionally, the parent or guardian must be present to sign the application form. If under 17, written permission from the family court must be obtained.

West Virginia

If either of you are under 18 years of age, you must have the consent (in person or written) of a parent or guardian. If written, the consent must be notarized. There may be special provisions for an underage bride who is pregnant.

Wisconsin

If either the bride or groom is under 18, you must have written, notarized consent from his or her parents or guardian. There is a Consent form available to be signed by parents or guardian before a County Clerk.

Wyoming

Applicants must be at least 18 years old or with written parental consent. Applicants under 16 years of age only with court order.

A final note — most of these restrictions apply to people being married within the boundaries of that specific state. In almost all cases, it doesn’t matter what state you come from as long as you meet the requirements for the state in which you’re being married.

This post is part of a series of posts answering questions about how old you have to be to do certain things. Other posts in this series include:

• How Old Do You Have to Be to Babysit?
• How Old Do You Have to Be to Buy Condoms?
• How Old Do You Have to Be to Rent a Hotel Room?
• How Old Do You Have to Be to Get a Job?

You might also be interested in this site which is about how old do you have to be in general. ]]> http://www.askdeb.com/blog/marriage/how-old-do-you-have-to-be-to-get-married/feed/ 4