What Do I Do If I Have Fallen In Love With A Married Man?
There is an old saying that you cannot tell your heart who they should fall in love with. Sometimes, despite all the warnings in your head, you may find yourself falling
in love with a man who is already married. You might know that he was married at the time or you might not. Married men are often the subject of some admiration from other women. Perhaps it is the idea of forbidden fruit. You want what you cannot have. Maybe it is just that he seems like such a great guy and is easy to fall in love with. Every year, women make this mistake and a mistake it is. Falling in love with a married man can have some severe social consequences. It can leads to heartache, frustration, and can even break up a good marriage. If you are involved in a situation like this, you may need to ask someone “what do I do if I have fallen in love with a married man”? The answer is to proceed carefully and consider your decisions before you act on them.
Is It Love Or Infatuation
Let’s say that you think that the guy at work is handsome, funny, and sensitive. He is incredibly easy to like. In fact, he is the perfect guy. You might have even started having fantasies about him. The only problem is he is married. But you still can’t help feeling an attraction to him. Ask yourself this: is it love or it is infatuation? A simple crush can often be mistaken for love. Infatuation is a strong emotion so it is easy to confuse the two. Yet how can you actually love someone unless you really know them and how can you really know them if you just see them at work and not in a social sense? To love someone is to know their good qualities as well as their bad qualities. You don’t want any surprises. It is difficult to know everything about someone unless you are already in a relationship with that person. So that is something you need to consider to figure out if you are truly in love or just infatuated.
Does He Know
This is very important because whether he knows or not determines how you proceed. If he does not know how you feel, then you need to consider if you should tell him or not. Do you think he might feel the same way? Do you think he might love you? You should only admit how you feel if you think there is a good chance that they might feel the same way about you. If the guy that you are in love with is happily married to a wonderful woman, then you should just keep your feelings to yourself and consider it as one of life’s unfair tragedies. If, on the other hand, the man’s marriage is rocky and you think the two of you share a connection, then you might consider opening up to him about your feelings.
To Pursue Or Not To Pursue
This is the toughest dilemma in falling in love with a married man. Should you pursue the affair? You need to be honest with yourself. An affair with a married man is adultery. Are you the type of person that can live with that kind of blame? Can you be a homewrecker? If the answer is no, then you should not pursue the relationship, even if the man is interested in you. If he has an unstable marriage, then wait and see if he separates or divorces her. Should that occur, then he is fair game.
If you are the type of person that has no problem being “the other woman”, then you should pursue the affair if he is interested and if he is not satisfied in his marriage.
How Does He Treat You
If you want to date a married man, what do you want to gain from the affair? Are you hoping to have a future with this man or are you just wanting to have fun? More importantly is, if you are already having an affair, how does he treat you? A married man may treat you better than his wife. He may be kind, considerate, and respectful. He may talk about leaving his wife and taking the relationship with you public. He may actually be that perfect guy that you thought he would be. But not all men are interested in a serious relationship. Some married men just want to satisfy their own needs and no matter what they tell you, they have no intention of ever leaving their wives. If you are in a relationship with a married man and you want to get something positive out of it, you need to be careful that the attraction is more than just physical and that you are not just being used.
Loving a Married Man – the Consequences of Forbidden Love
Before you go out and pursue a relationship with a married man, you need to be aware of the consequences. For one, you could be setting yourself up for a lot of heartache and anguish. If you really like the guy but he ends up using you, you are going to feel hurt and rejected. Or you may not get a chance to date him. he may spurn your affections and remain loyal to his wife. This can be equally devastating, not to mention embarrassing.
Another point to consider is that if people find out you may be labeled with many negative words such as “tramp”, “homewrecker” and other less than polite titles. This can cause no end of public shame not just to you but to those you associate with such as friends and family.
By pursing a relationship with a married man, you could break apart a marriage, even a stable one. This could cause you to receive threats from jealous wives or even, if he decides to end it, the man you were dating.
And if you love a married man but he is unwilling to leave his wife and family, then you may have to reconcile with the fact that you have to share him with another woman. This in itself can lead to jealousy and resentment because he is choosing his first love, his wife, over you. So before you share your feelings with that handsome married guy, know what you are getting yourself into.
This entry was posted on Tuesday, February 5th, 2013 at 2:56 pm and is filed under Love. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.