Spending quality time with your wife is important for the health of your marriage. But before you can spend “quality time”, you have to make certain you’re spending enough time with your wife, period. When you’re working to support a family and taking the time away from work to relieve stress, it can be hard to find the time to spend with our spouse and children. Often, you have to deal with people all day and the last thing you want to do when you get home is to spend time with your wife. At least, that thought has probably gone through your head at one time or another.
If you’re reading this article, though, you have recognized that life isn’t only about work and relieving the stresses of work. The best parts of life is the time we spend with our friends and loved ones, so we need to find the necessary time to spend with them. When you start looking over your daily schedule, though, you’ll start to realise there’s plenty of ways we can manage our time to spend more time with our loved ones.
Time Management Tips
Here’s a few time management tips for guys who want to spend more time with their wives.
1. Play Fewer Video Games
If you’re a guy in the under 40 category, you probably grew up playing video games and you find the XBOX 360 or Wii to be a good stress reliever. The problem is, video games aren’t a very social hobby and they consume huge blocks of time. While video games are fun, they are a pretty empty experience from a social point-of-view. So try to limit the time you spend in front of a video game console, because these devices are no friend of the happy family.
when you feel stress, sit down when you get in from work and play for a while. Just don’t let 30 minutes turn into 3 hours. Try to limit your video game time to times when the wife and kids aren’t around the house. Consider playing video games with the kids, but limit the time you do this to 30 minutes or so. Otherwise, you’re setting a bad example for the children, who are likely to learn the lesson that playing an immersive video game is more fun and more important than spending time with your spouse.
2. Limit Your Online Time
People who don’t spend much time on video games might be spending that slack time on the internet. I love the worldwide web, but the internet is one of the great time wasters ever invented. You can surf the net looking at videos, checking out your social networking website pages, emailing, looking at your auctions on ebay, reading about some obscure subject on Wikipedia, checking out cool artwork, looking up music videos or old tv clips on Youtube, and that’s just the stuff you wouldn’t mind your wife knowing that you do online.
Long story short, you can kill all evening if you enjoy surfing the internet. So limit your virtual time, especially when the wife is in the house. If you enjoy spending hours online, you have to know that most of this time is fruitless and wasted.
3. Watch Less Television
You might see a pattern developing here. Instead of spending time with your wife, you’re spending time with machines. While computers and tvs are great for entertainment, they really don’t fill our need for social interaction. The irony of social networking sites is that we aren’t really getting to know people very well, and the time we are interacting socially online is time spent away from social interaction with our family. But even as addictive as the internet can be, more people spend more time focusing on their tv than they do their computer. If you watch television several hours a night, then you can cut out a lot of that watching and spend more time with your wife.
Have certain shows you watch. Don’t watch television when those certain shows aren’t on. When you are watching the tv, try to make it something that your wife also will enjoy. If it’s a television show that you both enjoy, you’ll be able to talk about it later on and relate to one another. The two of you can comment while you’re watching about what you’re seeing. It can be a bonding experience.
Ultimately, though, you need to turn the television off at some point. Turn the tv off so the two of you can focus on each other for a little while. If you’re used to having the television on from the time you come home from work until the time you go to bed at night, then it might seem strange at first to switch the tv off. But if you try it, you’ll be rewarded.
Things To Do With Your Wife
Here are things to do with your wife besides watching television.
1. Help Her Cook Dinner
A common routine is for a man to come home from work and sit down in front of the tv (either to watch television or playing video games) while the wife cooks dinner. This is common, even in households where the wife also has a full-time job. But it doesn’t have to be that way. Turn the television off and go into the kitchen and help your wife cook dinner. Become her assistant cook.
Sure, you make things a little easier on her. But this also gives you time to interact with your wife and talk about your days. It’s an informal conversation while you cook the bread or set the table for dinner, and it naturally leads into the dinner conversation to come. You show that you’re interested in spending more time with her, and you’re more invested in the meal she cooked.
2. Take Time To Talk
Along those same lines, make certain the two of you have time to talk during the week. This might be serious talk, not-so-serious talk or just joking around. Whatever it is, the two of you have “quality time” together. Women like to talk about their lives, so take the time to listen to what she has to say and take a little interest in what’s going on in her life. You stay on the same page and hopefully don’t get on each others’ nerves.
Don’t feel the need to be “opinionated” when you talk to your wife, either. Guys naturally assume that women want them to weigh in with their opinion when they’re talking about whatever is on their minds, but often they just want to be heard. Often, if you give your opinion, it kills the conversation. Instead of a conversation, it becomes a debate or a “how-to” lecture. Take time to let your wife speak her mind. Then and only then should you add your two cents worth.
3. Hire a House Cleaner
This may not be feasible for someone in the current economic downturn or if the two of you are younger, but for couples that have a certain level of financial stability, you can free up a lot of time by “outsourcing” some of your house-cleaning needs to someone else. Instead of you and her cleaning the whole time you’re at the house, or staying on your children to do the same, or simply living in a mess, some of the chores are given to professionals and you have more time to spend with the wife.
4. Plan Your Weekends
Plan ahead for your weekend activities. Instead of lounging around the house all Saturday with nothing to do, plan excursions or activities with your wife on the weekend. When the two of you take time to plan your weekend, this is going to give you the chance to get more creative, because you can actually research things to do together. Also, there will naturally be the time you spend together planning your weekend.
It doesn’t have to be “dinner and a movie”. Planning your weekend allows you to go to talk about going on a day-trip, head out to the zoo or share time together in an art museum. All of these things do one thing that the standard trip to your favorite restaurant or movie theater doesn’t exactly do: it gives you some new subject to talk about. One thing about spending time with your wife is that the two of you often know what each other is going to say and to think, so sharing new experiences on the weekend will be stimulating, because you might not necessarily know what the other’s reaction will be.
Spending More Time With Your Wife By Changing Your Work Habits
Spending more time with your wife by changing your work habits can have an noticeble impact in your marriage. Here are some simple ideas you can follow in order to spend more time with your wife.
1. Leave Work Earlier
If you leave work late all the time, set aside days when you make certain you leave work the minute work is over. One unintended side effect is that you’ll probably notice you’re more productive at work that day, because you know that you have a set time you’re leaving. You can get as much work done when you stay on the ball all day and focus on your job, than if you plan on staying late to get the same work done.
Also, consider asking your boss about coming in an hour earlier to work and leaving an hour earlier in the afternoon. This might not work for all jobs, but I’ve known some employers who find these arrangements perfectly acceptable, as long as you work the hours and you remain as productive. This dovetails into the next point.
2. Avoid Rush Hour
Commute to work earlier in the morning to avoid rush hour traffic. You get to work earlier. You get started with your work when there are fewer distractions. You get finished sooner, and you go home sooner (hopefully also avoiding rush hour in the afternoon). This gives you more time in the afternoon and evening to spend with your wife.
3. Stop Daydreaming
It’s easy to get bored at work and start daydreaming. But if you can eliminate long periods of daydreaming while at work, you’ll be more efficient in your job and ready to get to the house as soon as your shift is over. The same goes for when you are at the house, when daydreaming cuts into even more of the time you could be spending with your wife.