How Do You Overcome Shyness?

Most people who tend to be shy are those who have had bad experiences or lack self esteem. This can be due from being talked down to, a bad experience with a stranger, or harshly punished as a child. Other people have been shy since birth and lack the confidence needed to step out of their shell. They feel as if they are being watched every move they make and do not want to be embarrassed by their actions be it verbal or physical. Some people live their whole life this way and the negative frame of mind and the scariness of getting over their shyness progresses with time.

Overcoming Shyness Tips & Advice

Being shy can be cute for a child, but as you grow up it will inhibit what you are willing to do as an adult and even go as far as inhibiting what you will be able to accomplish. Although it will be harder said then done, here are some overcoming shyness tips & advice.

Recognize Your Strengths

You have many and probably do not realize it. Many shy people tend to look at themselves in a more negative light and feel as if people can see right through them. The important thing to realize is that most people concentrate on themselves and their faults and do not look for faults in others. As self centered as that may sound, this also should provide some relief. They are looking at their own faults and not your own. Do not focus on any weaknesses you may have.

Practice Talking To Yourself in a Mirror

It is crucial to be able to talk to others and talking to yourself in a mirror can help. Have a conversations with yourself. Even go as far as practicing different conversations starters that you can try. Also practice standing straight and looking into the mirror as you talk. Body language goes a long way and you want to look interested in the person you are talking to.

Talk to Others


This may be hard but there really is no way around it. Initiate some conversation. A great way of doing this is “Hi, how is your day going?” Little did you know, the person you just asked had a great day and is bursting at the seams to tell you about it. Try this a couple times each day until you are comfortable. Engaging in conversations is the best way to get over your shyness.


Be engaged in what others are saying and express that through your body language and by saying simple things such as “Really?” “Wow!” or other things that show that you are interested. Looking at the floor or shuffling your feet because you feel embarrassed is only going to turn off the person you are talking to.

You Are Not Alone

Many others feel the same way you do, even worse. Isn’t it much easier to be in a room full of people knowing that half of them are just as shy? It should be, and it should be comforting as well. Many others face the same issues you may and if you can step out of the box and show them it is possible to overcome shyness you will have made some friends and have made some progress as well.

Practice, Practice, Practice

The most important thing that can do is practice these steps. There are so many ways to overcome being shy, but the most important is to be yourself and like yourself for who you are. Many others will like you as well as you become less insecure and more confident. Confident people stand out and are liked by their peers. Being liked also boosts self esteem, which in turn makes you more confident and less shy. See where this is going?

Although shyness is very common, it can also do more harm than good. There is nothing really positive that comes from being shy. You will notice that talking to others and feeling more secure about yourself will bring about positive things. It will also have a tendency to have a snowball effect or in other words, as things get better and you become more confident, it will only continue to do so until you are brimming with confidence. So go get in front of a mirror and start practicing and try to start a conversation with the first person you see. You will see a difference.

See Also: Falling in Love with a Friend and Fun Questions to Ask Friends.